The Free-Food-O-Meter

This week I missed the Bernard Price Memorial Lecture, which is quite annoying because its a great event. Not only is it free but it can also be mildly interesting, with speakers usually being leaders of industry or academia. I also tend to bump into quite a few classmates from varsity at this particular event as it's on campus, so it's quite a pleasant experience all round. The real clincher in the deal though, is the quality and quantity of the free food available afterwards, it is stellar. So I thought it would be handy for all you SAIEE, ECSA members and friends of mine (I will RSVP for you if you want in :) to rate the attendance-worthiness of an industry event.

1. The Event must be FREE

If the event costs you money, even 50 bucks, you are not getting maximum value my friend. I hate to break it to you but R50 even for "a networking cocktail party with substantial hot and cold snacks" is not the best deal in town. Think of the meal you can get for R50 at a goodish restaurant, we're talking steak- or pasta- or pizza-level dining right there.

2. The drinks must be free

I'm talking about soft drinks you beer-drinking heathen. I'm sorry but a "full cash bar will be provided for all drinks" is a serious damper to me getting my Fanta Pineapple on. If the alcohol drinks are charged for no sweat but the soft drinks have to be around the area of R0.

3. There must be enough food

I was sorely disappointed at an event once when I invited a whole bunch of friends with the premise of free food only to get there and find that all the chow had been obliterated by the hoards of engineers who think like me. I won't forget the feeling of loss as I looked at my face in the mirrors they used as the bottom of their sandwich trays (I think the caterers think it makes the sandwiches look bigger or more or something). There is nothing worse than sitting through a tedious engineering presentation only to be rewarded with the last sandwich on the tray with the dodgy filling.

4. Variety is key

Thousands of little sandwiches with hundreds of different fillings and maybe even their crusts cut off (always a nice touch) may look great but they often leave your palate longing for something more interesting. While you're washing down the dry sandwich with the lovely taste of Fanta Pineapple you feel like asking the caterers "Come on man! Where are the little pizzas and pies and pastries and those lovely pieces of chicken? Do you have any at the back there for the VIPs?"

I hope you guys find this guide helpful when you want some free food for pretending your deeply interested in the merits of electricity generation from manure. 

Oh and the signs are not yet taken down for the missing cat so I'm still hoping it will jump into my place through the kitchen or bathroom window. Hope springs eternal.